

a little something about a camp counselor doing not so little things at a not so little camp





Wow. Today was a blast. This staff has so much fun together. Logs were tiring, but I'm proud of my affirmation posters (all 20 or so!). I guess you could say that you know it's been a good, productive day when you have Mr. Sketch markers all over your fingers from 7 hours ago. The games were too much. We're going to have a fun camp. I'm excited for cute nightly meetings. I am scared+excited=anxious about TLPs (TL Partners). I just feel like the 2/3 last summer could have been better. Choosing to be hopeful.
(In relation to an activity entitled “On the Line”, in which one end of the room is a sign stating “Strongly Agree” and on the opposite side, a sign stating “Strong Disagree”, while a line in the middle of the room represents “Neutral”. Participants are asked to gage their opinion towards specific statements ranging from “I believe Barack Obama will do a good job as president” to “I believe in waiting to have sex until marriage” to “I think people in student government are snobs”.)
That was one of the best camp activities I’ve ever done. It truly did make you question your beliefs and what lies beneath them. I found myself wanting to ask staff members about specific opinions they had, like nutrition major Cami’s disagreement with the statement “Organic foods are better for you than non-organic foods” or assistant to the Barack Obama’s election campaign Jake Smith’s neutrality on the Obama statement mentioned above. And, I felt blessed when I could truthfully and triumphantly march to “Strongly Agree” in accordance to the statement “I have a best friend”. Although I debated making the distinction between “a best friend” and “at least one best friend”, I was fully aware that some of the staff members that remained neutral or disagreed were not struggling with the same thoughts.
And, I was again reminded that everyone judges- it’s human/American nature. What you do with those judgments is what makes the difference.
So, this is scary again. It’s so good to be back here and on my main room floor again, and in my dorms, and on my campus. But, I am being abruptly and clearly reminded of how scary this is for me. I can’t figure out why, but it is. These activities make me weak in the knees, teary-eyed, and nauseous. They require you to be big, but humbly big. Who knew that the anticipation of a 3-minute time span to be utilized only to ask you questions about yourself could instill such feelings of nervousness, insecurity, and in some cases inadequacy. Sigh. I appreciate the time we have together as a staff, but staff training is so scary. Glad to be done with Day One, but fully aware that only tougher, scarier things are to come.